Glendarin Hills #13 – #15

Glendarin Hills #13 – Par 3 – 164 yards – Handicap #16

tKO Average: 4.37 (+1.37, 10th hardest for tko participants)

GDH 13

Birdie Man money rubbing hands gif! Time. To. Get. Paid. $22K on the line! This is easily the best $200 we’ve ever spent on something at tKO. We’ll never actually win it, but shit man, can you even fucking imagine? Every year a few days before tKO, I have the same conversation with my wife. “How much money can I light on fire by way of fireball shots and mudslides if I make that hole in one without getting in trouble?”. Her answer is always too low for my liking, so I’ve decided the best move to just never tell her and spend all the evidence before I leave the city limits. I’m going to need all of us to be on the same page if and when this happens, okay guys?

 

Glendarin Hills #14 – Par 4 – 368 yards – Handicap #14

tKO Average: 5.5 (+1.5, 9th hardest for tko participants)

GDH 14

#14 being the 9th hardest hole is absolutely absurd, because there’s really nothing out there. I’m guessing this has more to do with guys being pretty drunk at this point. At least I hope so. Go ahead and swing away on the tee box, take out the aggression of not becoming an instant 22 thousandaire on the last hole. There’s some trouble left and long, but really nothing to be that afraid of.

During the scramble at tKOVI, it was on the #14 green when a shirtless Danny charged at Cahill like a fucking Rhino, only be tossed aside, sent tumbling down the side of the 15th tee box. It was like Cahill was some kind of judo champion! That or Danny has one skinny leg and a not so great sense of balance. One of those two.

 

Glendarin Hills #15 – Par 4 – 361 yards – Handicap #2

tKO Average: 6.54 (+2.54, 1st hardest for tko participants)

GDH 15

I’m not even going to bother with a hole review or strategic breakdown of how to attack this one, there’s only one thing worth discussing. If you take out Danny’s 16 and Jeremy’s 19 from tKOIX (I might have that backwards, but does it really matter?), the tKO average drops to 6.00 and is now the sixth hardest hole instead of the second. How in the fuck did Jeremy still win this flight with a 19!??! Trash flight, speak for yourself in the comments! I want a 30 for 30 made on this hole. Seriously, tell me everything. I mean, I can’t even.

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9 thoughts on “Glendarin Hills #13 – #15

  1. Jeremy says:

    I have no recollection of this.

  2. BIG NEWS UPDATE! says:

    After careful negotiations with the Hole-In-One insurance companies, we were able to get a reduced rate. Instead of passing that saving onto you, we felt is was more prudent to reinvest that saving into bigger prizes. Don’t worry, you’ll still get that opportunity to win new clubs from 2005, an LCD TV with AV hook-ups or the thrill of being tased on your round-trip domestic flight with United. However, the grand prize is going up. For those of you that thought $22K was life changing, just think about what you’ll do with…..$28,011!!!!!!!! That’s right, put down the Fireball and start pouring Chicken Cock Cinnamon Whiskey for your friends! Good Luck Gentleman!!

  3. WJ says:

    I have already spent my $28,011 so all that is left is just to drop my hole-in-one and I should be all set. Thanks!

  4. Kevin says:

    I hate this hole! In my memory the water is the size of Lake Michigan the green is 5 feet deep, with a cliff off the back that leads to the amazon jungle!!!

  5. Anonymous says:

    First I was hammered of makers, I do believe I’m 0-2 with charging tko members. (Ian)

    Second I have no idea how jeremy beat me on that trash flight but I believe he birdied the next hole where I shoy another snowman

  6. Keithtosis says:

    Watching Danny and Jeremy keep hitting 8 or 9 balls into the water was one of the greatest days of my life. It was like watching that fucking giraffe give birth. It was messy and anticipation of getting over the water was all glory. I don’t even care that I still got DFL it was glorious. Though I’m not sure how I got DFL after that. Russians got involved in the stats I believe.

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