tKOX CANCELLED

You guys, I have some very bad news. tKOX is cancelled. Or at least the Kendallville Open as we know it is. Because Danny D. officially withdrew this week, due to a “friend’s” wedding. THAT’S NOT EVEN WEDDING SEASON, BRO! Where’s your etiquette? Danny, you are friends with f’ing savages. The whole point of pre-Memorial Day tKO is to avoid this problem. You gotta cut this “friend” loose, Danny. R.I.P. This Guy. IMG_0778So assuming no one else bails (NO ONE ELSE BETTER BAIL), this brings Pete and Tall James back into the fold.  Since they’ve both attended two tKOs, their position on the wait list is based on their own merit, so no more piggy backing on your sponsor’s seniority. If we end up with just one spot for these two guys, TRIAL BY COMBAT!!! Or the ping pong balls. I’m going to vote for Trial By Combat, but I’ll at least take it to the board. So stay tuned you guys. Lastly, we might be 10 months out from the Kendallville Open X, but an event of this magnitude needs some room to breath. Obviously tKOX will take place in Kendallville, IN and will feature the same debauchery that we all know and love (TURNED UP TO LEVEL FUCKING 10), however, I’d like to propose something else. Something to commemorate a decade (ish) of Kendallville Opens. Mike C., we’ve earned this. Mike R., you haven’t, but you are still an OG by default. Oh what’s this? Just Bandon Fucking Dunes. Only the Golf Digest’s number one golf resort for the past fucking forever. No. Big. Deal. I’m thinking February 2017. Why am I bringing this up 19 months in advance? A number of reasons:

  1. So you don’t get anyone pregnant.
  2. Because this trip will not be cheap. Gonna need some time to slowly siphon that money from your better half and/or child’s college fund.
  3. It’s far as fuck. Organizing tKO in Kendallville is hard enough, this is going to be a massive undertaking.
  4. So you don’t get anyone pregnant.
  5. And lastly, so you don’t get anyone pregnant.

Since Bandon Dunes is kind of a once in a lifetime kind of deal, this won’t be a tKO exclusive trip. Do you have a friend/family member that would be interested and don’t like quite enough to invite them to the real tKO? Let them know. Unfortunately, this will be a pretty serious golf trip, no blacking out and swimming in the water hazards, so I know this won’t be for everyone. However, if it’s something you’d be interested in, let me know.

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13 thoughts on “tKOX CANCELLED

  1. Brooks says:

    Put back on the list – officially out of retirement OG

  2. Aschbomb says:

    1. Does the Trash Flight now get renamed?
    2. Can you elaborate on why no blacking out and jumping in water hazards? Compromise on blacking out and showing your testicles to the cart girl being ok? Recreational weed IS legal there.

  3. arab machine says:

    easy there tigers. I couldn’t help but match Jeremy’s 16 on 1 hole. This was my year

  4. arab machine says:

    I hate you all. I’m thinking I should be the one to decide who takes my spot. Who wants to start paying me

  5. shorts says:

    Just booked a ticket to OR for all of February 2017.

  6. AJ says:

    When can I book my flight?

  7. Jeremy says:

    Is this a full four rounds? Or just one?

  8. Bixler I says:

    Like Bo for Hank, I’ll be playing tKOX left-handed in honor of Nugget. Interested in Oregon depending on the proximity of the Applebee’s to the Best Western.

  9. Anonymous says:

    Bixler I is my hero

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